Got a Buzzcut

Nov 23

Written By Fayth™

Dearest J,

I shaved my head after 20 years of wanting to but not doing it for fear of alienating my family.

Which I did.

But screw that.

Very brief backstory (short version: I shaved my eyebrows first, then my head):

Short Version:
I shaved my eyebrows first, then my head through an ironic suggestion of a church friend
Long Version:
A few months ago, I was talking to my small church group and I spoke to two girls and I told them, I wanted to buzz my head. And they’re like NOOO DON’T DO IT! One girl recommended I shave my eyebrows instead, which I am not sure she was 100% thinking would be a good alternative, she probably said it jokingly. Nevertheless I thought to myself … genius. So I shaved my eyebrows, and they grew back in 6 weeks. So I shaved my head. My mother is not pleased, and my uncle thinks I’m “woke” … to which I say, I shaved it before the election on Halloween. Originally I wanted to do it on my partners birthday, but he didn’t want to do it for me. So I waited the day after and he still didn’t want to. So the day after was halloween, and I thought. I’m just gonna do it myself, so he gave me his blades (thankfully he has a kit) and I just did it. Both times (when I shaved my eyebrows AND my head) I recorded myself and talked it out, which helped me to fully go through with it.

Some church folks avoid me now, but others love it.

Either way … I’m rocking it. Regardless of this political climate, I’ve wanted to do this for SO LONG and it feels so damn FREEING to just pull the plug on it.

I don’t care if it makes me look like a nun, like I’m cancer-baiting (I’m not), gay, like I’m protesting the election or whatever. This is not a political statement, this is not a badge of me being sick or gay. This is simply someone who felt so oppressed to listened to others opinions for SO LONG that they finally let go and did the thing they wanted to do anyway.

And for that … I’m proud.

12-steps is slowly working for me in that sense. I’m becoming less “co-dependent” and asking for others opinions and advice less.

Thanks for listening! <3