Finally Leaving My Abusive Partner
Dearest J,
I don’t know how else to put it. My partner ripped the house keys off my purse in a flurry of anger, and I decided not to return. There’s a lot more detail there that I’d rather not get into. But essentially, I’ve decided to AirBnb a home for 5 days, and then go to Hawaii for 3 weeks, to live with 19 other digital nomads and help the local community.
I feel in a weird way, a return of belief in faith.
Not sure what I believe in exactly. I’m still reading ACIM, and am currently also reading a book on Zen:
In a way though, I’m curious about the difference still about Zen, Buddhism, Christianity, Judaism etc. These are all constructs, I’m realizing.
I also watched in this AirBnb, since there is a TV and I never watch TV, the “Designed” series on Netflix. At my chiropractors office they played something of that series, and I suddenly remembered it as it’s quite old already.
But as I watched a few of them, it brought energy back into my bones somehow.
I got to remembering my career in design, and I have a few things up my sleeve, which includes:
Getting a drone-based product designer role (designing software interfaces)
Getting a global digital design director role (mostly managing designers and crafting brand for a really cool outdoor shoe / lifestyle brand)
Getting a discount for Kajabi to continue my business ideas
Doing something different, like just become a cinematographer, an artist, or something else
I don’t know, but I need to decide by tomorrow. Because it’s the end of black friday, and all these deals for business-related things are happening. I need to decide if I will do my dreams, or get a job. And if I get a job, then why. And what for, and where would I go once I return from Hawaii. What would I do.
I return on Christmas Eve, which is also the 3rd anniversary of my sobriety.
I will probably go to my current church service, and then Christmas too.
That leaves:
26
27
28
29
30
31 - New Years
1st - New Years
Questions:
Where will I be those 5 days?
Where will I be for New Years?
Where will I go after that?
Will I remain where I am, or move back home with my parents?
Will I return to Hawaii?
What do I really want out of life, anyway?
Dearest J, please help me.
In the name of Jesus I pray, Amen <3
